Thursday, 23 March 2017

Josh & Cody Brawl

, Alright let's start from the beginning shell we, Principle

Mike Hopkins said.”

, I was standing over the gym door's when Cody came up behind

me and punched me, I said.”

, What ever Josh, you know that's not true, Cody replied.”

, Hey keep quiet Josh, Mike said slamming his hand on his


, but sir, Cody lying to you, like he always does, Josh said.”

, Why don't you let me decide that for myself, hows that

sound, Mike said.”

One of the longest days of life took place in Principle

Mike Hopkins office, has Cody and I sat there arguing over who

started a fight on the playground 3 months ago. I don't

remember much about the fight. But from what I heard in the

halls, is that I took one hell of beating at the hands of Cody

and his 2 other friends.

All I know is that the fight some how got started when one

of Cody's friends told Cody that I was screwing around with his

girlfriend and one thing lead to another and a fight broke out

during gym class on the playground. I hate to say it but Cody

has poor taste in girls. I don't know how anyone could find

such a fugly looking girl, who had been beaten with an ugly

stick more then once in her life time.

, Last time I'm telling you to be quiet Josh, Mike replied

pointing his finger at me.”

, continue Cody, Principle Mike said.”

, One of my friends came up to me during the afternoon break

and told me that Josh had been making move's on my girlfriend,

so I went up to Josh to ask him about it, Cody said.”

, Nice lie asshole, I said.”

,You wanna go right now Josh, because you know I'll kick your

ass again, Cody said kicking his chair.”

, come on asshole let's go right now, oh wait your loser

friends aren't here to help your fugly ass out again, I replied

pushing my chair.”

Needless to say nothing got resolved that afternoon in

Mike's office. I walked out the front doors of the school and

headed for the parking lot where my dad was waiting for me. At

one point my principle and my dad even got in to a fight back

when they where kids. Too this vary day they still don't like

one another all that much.

Cody came running out of the gym door's, as he tried to cut

me off from getting to the parking lot.


, MAKE ME!, Cody replied.”

I started to clinch my fist, just as my dad and principle

Mike came walking out of the parking lot. Cody and I where

right in each other face. We stared at each other for a few

seconds then Cody started backing away.

, YAH! Walk away like a little pussy, I said.”

, what did you just call me, Cody replied.”

, you fucking heard me, your a pussy, just like your

girlfriend is, I repeated.”

, Make me, Cody said.”

Cody took one swing just missing the side of my face. I

then swung back at Cody connecting right in his jaw breaking it

in 2 spots. Cody drooped to the ground like a load of bricks

falling off the back of a pick up truck. I stood over Cody

yelling at him to get up.

, come on tough guy get up and fight me, I said ripping his

jacket off.”

, Josh knock it off, and get your ass in the car now, my dad

yelled out.”

Just before I let go of Cody, I made sure I got one last

shot in on him while he was down, just to make a point. I gave

Cody one good kick in the ribs just to add insult to injury. As

I walked to the car which was parked just at the entrance of

the teacher's parking lot, I notice Cody's fugly girlfriend

giving me the stink eye.

, YOUR NEXT BITCH, I yelled.”

, SHUT THE FUCK UP JOSH, Kristen shouted back.”

, BITE ME WHORE, I yelled back.”

I got in to my dad's car and sat in the front seat looking

straight ahead. My dad's body language spoke loud and clear,

that he was pissed off with me.

, Wanna explain all that bull shit to me Josh, my dad said.”

, NO! Not really, I replied.”

, that's fine then, consider your ass grounded for the next 3

months. Also your computer and cell phone are also gone, do I

make myself clear, my dad said smacking the steering wheel.”

, what the fuck dude, I need my computer and cell phone for my

home work dad, come on.”

, Next time you'll think before you do something as stupid as

fighting on school grounds, my dad said.”

The car ride home was anything but quiet, my dad and I

where having it out. This was not normal for my dad and I we

hardly ever fought with each other. Most of the time I would

always fight with my step mom who also was a real bitch and

still is to this day. Granted that she royally fucked my dad

over in so many ways it wasn't funny. But that's besides the

point. My dad clearly angry with me and the fact that I would

get in to 3 fights with the same kid. That was fine with me but

honestly it took Cody and his 2 friends to beat me up. I only

needed a left hook and a solid right kick to Cody's rib cage to

prove I could kick Cody's ass.

, dad all I'm saying is that it took 3 guys to beat the shit

outta me, where it only took one left hook and a good swift

kick the rib cage to knock out that dumb fuck, I said.”

, Josh just stop. Nothing you say will get your computer back

or your cell phone back and your ass is still grounded for 3


I slammed the car behind me and walked in to the house. I

went right to my room and slammed the door. I laid on my bed

staring up at my ceiling. There was knock on my bedroom door, I

put my head phones on so I couldn't hear who ever was knocking

at my door. The door opened and my step mom walked in to room,

I just laid there looking at my ceiling.

, Hey Josh, can we talk for a bit, she asked.”

, knock your self out, but don't expect me to listen to your

ass, I replied.”

, Look Josh, I know you don't like me and I can respect that.

All I'm trying to do is help you.”

, how are you helping my ass. Your ripping us off by pwning

all of our stuff plus you sold my moms jewelry for fuck sake's,

I replied.”

, okay yes I screwed up, but that doesn't mean you can treat

me like shit Josh, Kim said.”

, Sorry I don't much care for people who think they can just

sale someone else personal belonging's to whom ever they

please, I said slamming my fist on my bed.”

, Well I'm sorry you feel that way about me Josh, I really am,

Kim said as she walked out of the room.”

I just laid in my bed, even more angry then I was when I

got home. The fact that my step mom thought that some how she

could just come in to my bedroom and cheer me up, boy was she

wrong. I got up and went down stair's I needed some air. My dad

made it a point to remind me that I was grounded and couldn't

hang out with any of my friends. As far as I was concerned I

had no friends.

I heard Kim say something as I walked out the front door

and sat on the front step. The door opened and sure enough my

step mom from hell walked out and stood behind me, breathing

down the back of my neck.

, What the fuck do you want now, I said.”

, Can you please stop swearing, it really bothers me

that you talk to me like I'm trash.”

, Don't see how that's my problem, I'm not that who fucked

their boss, I replied.”

, Alright I admit it Josh, I'm nothing more then a slut, does

that make you feel better, Kim said.”

, Jesus Christ Kim leave me the fuck alone, is that asking to

much to ask, I yelled.”

I got up and went back inside the house. My dad was

standing in the kitchen door way when I came storming in the

house. I looked at my dad and just shook my head, then went

back up to my room with out saying a word to him. I could hear

my dad asking Kim what in the hell was going on. Kim told my

dad that she was only trying to have a friendly conversation

with me on the front porch.

, Kim why can't you leave Josh a lone when he is in a bad

mood, why, my dad asked.”

, Because maybe I care about Josh just as much as you do and I

wanna have a relationship with him, but he keeps pushing me

away, Kim said.”

, I know you do, I know you do, my dad replied.”

For what it was worth, I had to give Kim credit for trying

to talk to me about everything that was going on between me and

that Jack ass Cody. I was laying on my bed just staring up at

the ceiling when all of a sudden I thought to myself maybe Kim

is the one person I can get to understand what's really going

down between Cody and I. After all Cody and I did hide our gay

relationship from everyone. Now Cody and I just wanted to rip

each others thought's out.

I got up off my bed and walked towards my bedroom door. I

stopped myself from opening it. I stood there for a minute or

two with my back ageist the door. As I stood there I could hear

footsteps coming up the stairs. They stopped short of my

bedroom door. I kept my ear as close to my door as I could get

it. I knew by the sound of the foot steps who they belong to

and there was no way I was going to let Cody get the jump on me

I was good and ready for him. I reached over and grabbed my

baseball bat and held it in my left hand as I opened my bedroom


, What the fuck are you doing in my house Cody,I asked.”

, I just wanna talk man to man, Cody replied.”

, yeah right, I'm not that stupid Cody, put down your led pipe

and then maybe I'll come out and talk to you, I said.”

, Josh I'm unarmed trust me, just come out of your room and

let's talk, Cody said.”

, Okay go wait on the landing for me, I said.”

, Come on Josh stop wasting time, just come out of your room

please I'm begging you man to man, Cody replied.”

I opened my bedroom door just a crack and looked out in the

both directions to make sure Cody wasn't trying to get me to

fall in to one of his traps. I turned and looked towards the

landing where Cody was standing.

, What the fuck do you want Cody, I said.”

, I just wanna work things out with you I'm tired of fighting

all the time, Cody said.”

, Then why don't you start talking instead of just standing

there looking like a pathetic Jack ass, I replied.”

, Can we talk in your bedroom Josh, Cody said.”

, What ever it is you have to say you can say it right here in

the hallway, I replied.”

,I'd rather not say what I have to say right here, where our

parents could hear, Cody said.”

I let out a deep breath then looked at Cody.

, okay but you better make this quick because right now I just

wanna beat the living day light's out of you, I said.”

We walked in to my room. I have to admit I really wanted to

beat Cody over the head with my baseball bat. AS much as I

wanted to do this act of murder to Cody, I heard this little

voice in my head saying just hear him out. The other little

voice in my head said if you like what Cody says then just slam

the baseball bat over his head.

, Okay talk, I said crossing my arms.”

, look Josh I don't want to fight anymore I just wanna be able to move on with my life, Cody said.”

, So then why start shit that you can't finish Cody, I asked.”

, I always finish what I start Josh you know that, Cody


, Is that why you need your buddy's to help knock my ass out,

I said.”

, Those guys are not my buddy's and for your information they

jumped in on our fight, Cody said.”

, Sure they did, I replied.”

Cody let out a deep breath and just looked at me like he

wasn't getting any where. I looked back at him with a dirty

look. I had so many different thoughts running through my mind

of how I could hurt Cody really badly to the point that he

would never be able to walk again, or at least close to it.

, Alright I see we are never going to be able to work this

problem out between us. Maybe I should just go, Cody said.”

, Where the fuck do you think your going, I said.”

, I'm leavening, your not interested in talking to me, Cody


, No your not, your going to sit the fuck down and your going

to listen to me now, I said pointing to my desk chair.”

Cody stopped just in between the door and the hallway. He

stood there for a moment or two just looking at the stair case.

Cody came back in to my room and closed the door behind him.

He walked slowly over to my desk and sat down in the chair.

, what do you want to say, Cody said with a wispy voice.”

, All I want to say is that all this fighting we have been

doing and trying to rip each other apart is not getting us

anywhere. So what I'm thinking is maybe we just stay away from

each other from now on, maybe one day we could be friends again
, Cody said.”

, SO what are you saying Cody, your giving up, I asked.”

, basically I'm not going to fight you anymore and I just want

all these hard feeling's that we have for one another to just

go away, Cody replied.”
In all honesty what Cody offered actually made a lot of

senses and I quickly realized that I was in favor of his idea.

That night Cody and I shook hands. Cody turned and walked out

of bedroom with out saying a word. I stood there and watch as

Cody and his dad left. Cody made no eye contact has he walked

out the front door. For the first time in my life I had lost a

friend that I once respected. Now I wouldn't even give Cody the

shirt off my back if he beg me for it.

Thing's got a lot better at school and with Cody getting

transferred to another school, there was a more relaxed

feeling and I started to like school again. 

Thursday, 2 March 2017

Hidden Gender

 We walked in to Kyle's bedroom holding hands as we sat down on

the edge of Kyle's bed. We starred in to each others eyes as we

locked our lips together. I could feel Kyle's hot breath as he

kissed me passionately. My heart was racing like a race horse.

My hormones where running wild as I held Kyle tightly in my

arms. I have to admit Kyle was hot as hell, and I was the

luckiest guy on the face of the earth.

Kyle and I first met back in middle school. I was one grade

below Kyle. One day I was just standing by the door's when Kyle

came over asked me if I wanted to play catch with him. Of

course I said yes. If there was one thing that my mom always

taught me was that you never let a hot guy out of your sight

when he asks you to play catch with him.

In some strange way I always had this feeling that my parents

knew that I had strong feelings for Kyle. Either way I didn't

really care if they knew or didn't know. All I know was that I

was madly in love with Kyle despite our age difference.

Kyle would call me every night, once he was done eating dinner

with his family. We would spend hours talking on the phone, we

would even quietly having phone sex so our parents wouldn't

hear us talking dirty with each other.

I heard my mom coming up the stairs. I quickly pulled the

phone away from my ear and listen to hear if she was coming

towards my bedroom door. The last thing I wanted to have happen

was my mom catching me having phone sex with a boy I really

liked. The risk was more then I could bare, so I told Kyle I

would call him back once my mom was out of ear shot of my

bedroom door.

Once my mom was out of ear shot of my bedroom door, I quickly

grabbed my cell phone off my bed. I sent Kyle a quick text

message that said coast is clear. My phone rang a second after

I sent the text message to Kyle.

“, Hey baby, I said.”

“, Hey hot stuff, how are you doing, Kyle replied.”

“, I'm doing good thanks, how are you doing.”

“, Not to bad.”

“, So what are you doing tomorrow night, I asked.”

“, I might just stay home and play video game's, why do you

ask, Kyle replied.”

“, wanna go to the movies tomorrow night.”

“, sure, it beats staying home and playing video games.”

“, cool, I replied.”

Kyle and I hung up after talking on the phone for 3 hours and

our cell phones where about ready to die. I had 1 bar left on

my cell and it was just enough to send Kyle one last text

message good night.

I plug my cell phone in, so it could charge over night while i

was sleeping. I tossed and turned for several minutes I finally

sat up took a drink of water before lying back down. My mind

was racing and I kept thinking about my secret I was hiding

from Kyle. It wasn't anything bad, I just don't wanna creep him

out or anything like that.

My parents always kept me out gym class and from swimming

lessons because my gender is unknown. I shouldn't say my gender

isn't known, because in all honesty I have both male and

female part's. I just haven't picked which sex I want to be yet

because I honestly don't know which sex I prefer yet.

I woke up bright and early the next morning. I jumped in the

shower, then headed down stairs to make myself something to eat

for breakfast. I grabbed my cell phone out of my pocket and

sent Kyle a text message, that said meet me at Gage park by the

play ground.

Kyle responded back a few minutes later, saying okay see you

shortly. I must be out of my mind, but this was something I had

to do and Kyle needed to know the truth about me. I started

getting ready, when my dad came down stairs.

“, hey big guy, do you want a ride to school today, my dad


“, it's okay dad, think I'm going to walk to school today, I


“, Okay straight to school, your mother and I don't want

another phone call from your teacher again, got it.”

“, got it dad.”

I started walking towards Gage Park to meet up with Kyle. As I

was walking I kept thinking about how i was going to break the

news to Kyle that I was a transgender youth who had basically

both male and female parts. This was not going to be the

easiest thing for me to do, but I had to tell him before he

found out from someone else.

My cell phone beeped 2 times. I reached in to my pocket and

pulled out my cell phone. Kyle had sent me a text message that

read over by the band shell, where are you at. I replied back

and told Kyle that I was a block away from the park and that I

would be there in a 6 minutes give or take the traffic lights.

Kyle wrote back a second later saying cool.

The moment had come, there was no backing out now. I had to

tell Kyle face to face about my secret I had been hiding from

him this whole time.

“, Good morning Kyle, I said.”

“, Good morning, Cody. So what's up, Kyle replied.”

“, Kyle there is something I need to tell you about me.”

“, Okay, what is it Cody. Just tell me, Kyle replied.”

“, Alright, Kyle you how some people are born with both male

and female parts, I said.”

“, Yeah, but what does that have to do with anything Cody, Kyle


“, Look Kyle I'm a male, who was born with female parts.”

Kyle moved away from me once I told that I was a transgender

male who was born with female parts. Kyle and I sat on the band

shell for a couple minutes either of us said a word to each

other. I guess it was a good sign that Kyle didn't get up and

walk away he just sat there with his head down.

“, Kyle, I said.”

“, what is it Cody, Kyle replied.”

“, Are you okay, I asked.”

“, I don't know dude, I just need some time figure things


Kyle jumped off the band shell and started walking away. All I

could do was watch Kyle walk away. I reached in to my pocket

and grabbed my cell phone. I sent Kyle a text asking him if we

where still dating. Kyle never answered my text.

For the first time in my life I actually felt like I was alone

with no one to turn too. Kyle was the only boy I had ever

fallen in love with.

A whole month had passed before I heard anything from Kyle

again. I woke up just before 7 in the morning when my cell

phone rang. I grabbed it off of the night stand that was beside

my bed to see who had just called me. When I looked at my phone

I noticed I had 2 texted messages one was from my parents and

the other was from Kyle. The from my Parents read Cody your mom

and I will be home late don't wait up. For some reason I was a

little hesitant about opening Kyle's message. I walked to down

to the hall and hopped in to the shower to get cleaned up. I

brushed my teeth then headed down stairs to grab some


I reached in to my pocket to grab my cell phone. I realized

that I had left it sitting on my night stand beside my bed. I

ran back up stairs to grab my cell phone. Something in my head

told me to leave my phone at home. I turned around and

went back down stairs grabbed my back pack and headed off

to school.

When I arrived at school, Kyle was standing by the door. I

walked by him and didn't say a word to him. I got a few steps

inside the door when I herd Kyle call out my name.

“, Sam can I walked to you.”

“, What the hell for Kyle, I said.”
“, Look I haven't been able to sleep the last couple of night's

since I walked off on you, Kyle said.”

“, fine I'll meet you over by the wall at break time, I said.”

“, Sam I don't understand why we can't just go somewhere and

talk right now, Kyle said.”

“, For starters I have a class to get too, and secondly I'm not

interested in talking to you at the moment.”

I walked down the hall to my first class. I looked back and

Kyle was just standing there shaking his head. I took my seat

towards the back of the class. Kyle walked in to the class room

right behind the teacher. Kyle sat in front of me. He turned

around and flash me a dirty look. So I flash him a dirty look


“, Dude why are acting like this, Kyle asked.”

“, acting like what Kyle, you started it when you walked away

from me at Gage Park, I replied.”

“, How did I start it, when you kept your secret from me the

whole we were dating, Kyle said.”

“, I think that's the first honest thing you have said to me

since you walked away from me that afternoon Kyle, I said.”
The bell rang and I grabbed my book's when Mr. White stopped

me before I could walk out the door. I stood there waiting for

the other students to all leave the class room. Funny thing is

Kyle was also stopped by Mr. White and told to stay after class

so he could talk to us about something.

“, Is this your doing again Sam, Kyle asked.”

“, fuck no. Why would I get Mr. White involved in our

problem's, I said.”

“, I don't know, maybe because your a teachers pet, Kyle

replied crossing his arms.”

“, what ever Kyle, I replied.”

Mr. White closed the door and then walked over to where Kyle

and I were sitting. He put his leg on one of the chair's. Mr.

White was clearly having trouble with getting something off his

chest and it showed in his facial expression.

“, Alright boys I want you both to listen to me vary closely,

said Mr. White.”

I nodded my head while Kyle just sat there with his head down

on his desk.

“, Look I'm not going to sit here and act like I don't know

when two of my favourite students in this school are at odds

with one other.”

“, It's not that we are at odds with each other. We are just

having some problems that Sam and I seem to be unable to solve

like human beings, Kyle said.”

“, is that true Sam, Mr. White asked.”

I really didn't want to answer Mr. White's question. But some

how the words just slipped out of my mouth.

“, no that's not true sir, I replied.”

“, Alright then what is the truth then, Mr. White asked.”

“, Yeah! Sam what is the honest truth, Kyle said.”

I let out deep breath, and ran my hands through my hair, while

I thought about how to explain my secret to Mr. White. For the

second time in 10 days I found myself in the hot seat yet again

only this time it was in Mr. White's computer class.

“, Sir you know how you and Kyle where born with just one sex,

I said.”

“, yes.”

“, while sir, you see I was born with while both male and

female part's. I don't really have a specific gender that I

identify with, Sam said.”

“, Alright is this what's causing all the problem's between you

two, asked Mr. White.”

“, Yes that is just one part of the problem Mr. White what Sam

didn't tell you is that he kept his condition from me, Kyle

said angrily.”

“, Here is what I think need's to happen. The both of you need

to stop acting like little kids first of all. Secondly I don't

understand how Sam's being transgender even effects you Kyle,

Mr. White said.”

“, well to me it does when I'm Sam's boyfriend, Kyle


“, Since when did you care if I was transgender or not. I could

told you I was female and you wouldn't have thought twice about

walking away.”

“, your right Sam, I don't care. The only reason why I don't

care is because I'm gay alright. I don't like girl's I never

have and I never will like girls, said Kyle.”

From that point on Kyle and I never spoke too one another ever

again. We would pass each other in the hall's with out making

any eye contact with each other. Since Kyle hooked up with

another guy, who ended up infecting him with the HIV virus. As

for myself I ended up getting surgery to become a male. I now

currently have a girlfriend who is expecting our first child

any day now.

If there is one thing that I hope everyone takes from this, is

don't be afraid to tell people about who you are. It's doesn't

matter if your transgender like I'm. Or if your gay, bi,

straight, it really shouldn't matter. All that matter's is

people should like you for who you are and not for what they

think you are. Because those are the people who truly care

about you.